Meta Bathroom Remodeling

In the wake of the Meta-verse, EZ Bath has officially (and very spiritually) rebranded as Meta Bath™—the first bathroom company to offer showers that exist in a different plane of reality. Will it reduce your water bill? Unclear. Will your rubber duck achieve enlightenment? Strong maybe. While our legal team remains unamused, our creative team has prepared this totally serious (not serious) announcement.

Ultra Meta Tub-To-Shower Conversion

You heard it here first, folks: we now convert your tub into a shower so clean it gets Megatron spotless after a 12-parsec brawl with Optimus. Don’t have room for one? Don’t worry—this shower exists in the Meta-Verse, where building codes are feelings and grout lines are only a suggestion.

• Zero-Gravity Rinsing: Soap scum is scared of heights.
• Teleport Drain™: Water leaves before it hits the floor. Physics pending.
• Quantum Niche: Stores everything and nothing, simultaneously.

Meta Walk-In Tubs

Tired of stepping over the tub? Don’t. With Meta Walk-In Tubs, you think about bathing, and boom—you’re cleaner than your internet search history. Slip resistant? Yes. Reality resistant? Also yes.

Meta Customer Service

No need to call us. We all co-exist, and your problem is already solved in at least three adjacent timelines. Still want to talk to a human? Okay, fine: our very real humans at EZ Bath (in this universe) answer phones, reply to emails, and show up on time.

New Meta Bath Logo

Behold! Our logo will be rendered by a cooperative of friendly AIs, several houseplants, and an algorithm trained on “things that look expensive.” Estimated delivery: soonish. Preview: imagine a droplet… but it’s also a galaxy.

Okay, But… What’s Real?

All jokes aside, we still do real remodels in the real world—with warranties, permits, drainage that obeys gravity, and waterproofing that doesn’t require quantum math. Ready for the non-meta stuff?

• Tub-to-Shower Conversions — safer entries, smarter layouts, done right.
• Shower Remodels — beautiful, low-maintenance finishes (tile or Onyx).
• Walk-In Tubs — accessible, comfortable, spa-grade features.
• Full Bathroom Remodels — design-build, start to finish.

Meta FAQs (Frequently Absurd Questions)

Q: Will my shower exist in multiple dimensions?
A: Only if you pick the checkerboard tile.

Q: Can I install Meta Bath myself?
A: You can attempt to think it into place, but our licensed installers are faster in this reality.

Q: Does Meta Customer Service read minds?
A: We tried. HR asked us to stop. But we do listen carefully.

Q: Does Meta Bath accept crypto?
A: We accept currencies that pay plumbers and electricians—so, dollars.

Back to Reality (Let’s Build Something Beautiful)

When you’re done laughing, we’ll be here with 3D design, real schedules, and craftsmanship your future self will thank you for. Curious what’s possible?

Explore shower remodels · tub-to-shower conversions · contact us

FAQ

Q: Are you actually changing your name to Meta Bath?
A: No. We remain proudly EZ Bath in this universe. The multiverse version is still pending a trademark search.

Q: Do you offer 0% financing?
A: Yes—on approved credit. Ask about our 6-year, 0% interest plans and start paying after the work is finished.

Q: Do you still install Onyx, KERDI, and Delta fixtures?
A: Absolutely. We pair systems like KERDI, Onyx, and Delta for durability and easy cleaning.

Q: Can I see real projects?
A: Yep—our Before & Afters gallery lives right here in this timeline.